Seiko-chan's great adventure
by SeikoXSachiko239
Summary: Alternate Universe, Pre-Heavenly host. Seiko is an upcoming Youtube sensation! But will she be able to mend the broken bonds with her girlfriend Naomi! Find out!
1. Life Without Subscribers Isn't Life All

**This takes place in an alternate universe before Heavenly host, in which Seiko is trying to become a Minecraft Youtuber and also is in a relationship with Naomi and also there are some original characters that will be unveiled at a later date, Ssssshhhh ;)**

Chapter 1: Life without subscribers isn't life at all

"Seiko, you suck. Please log off the internet and then log out of life."

As Seiko read this comment on her latest Minecraft Let's Play video, she felt her crippling depression which she usually hid so well rise up to the surface.

Warm tears flowed down her face, much like a miniature river, when she read another comment that said:

"women shouldn't be alowd to pley video games. Get back to kitchen."

and yet another that said:

"Kill you're self or I'll kill you're self for u"

Seiko was considering hanging herself in the school bathroom the next day when her lover, Naomi, entered the room. Naomi was a total cutie with short hair and stuff who was also secretly gay, but that didn't stop all the boys from going totally crazy over her.

Naomi said, "Hey girl! Did you see the last episode of Onii-chan adventure 6: Uncensored Edition?

Seiko replied curtly, "You know I don't mess with that hentai crap anymore, Naomi. I'm a hardcore Minecraft Youtuber now.

Naomi said, "oh, right, I forgot. How many subscribers are you at?"

Seiko looked down for a moment, feeling the tears well up again. "Five, now that my mom unsubscribed."

Naomi came over to the bed where Seiko was sitting and plopped her child-bearing-hips onto Seiko's Misaka Mikoto bodypillow. "That sucks, dudette. Anyway, in the latest episode, Kaito-kun totally hooks up with Memushite-san and-"

Seiko was not in the mood for such lollygagging, "I told you Naomi, I don't have time for little girls being raped by tentacles anymore. Go away!"

Naomi looked shocked, "Well fine, if you wanted to break up, you could have just said so!" Naomi ran out of the room crying.

"Naomi, wait!" Seiko and Naomi had never fought before, how could this have happened?

"It's all my fault!" wailed Seiko.

 **O man! That sure was intense! Wow! Woah!**

 **Anyways, please give me good reviews thx.**

 **Tell me if you want to see more chapters, I can't wait to tell the rest of the story!**


	2. Life Without Naomi Isn't Life At All

**Chapter 2: Life without Naomi isn't life at all**

At Kisaragi Academy the next day, Seiko saw Naomi. She tried to approach her and apologize, but Naomi pretended not to hear anything at all. She walked away, giving Seiko a look of pure disgust, but underneath the disgust, there was sadness.

Seiko was depressed, and Yoshiki could see that. Yoshiki was a classmate of Seiko & Naomi.

He was also a total pervert.

Yoshiki walked over to Seiko with a suspicious smile on his face, bright blond hair twitching as if it had a life of it's own. "Hello Seiko... Looking... Heh... Attractive today... Heh heh... You look even hotter when you're depressed."

"Thanks Yoshiki, but I'm not in the mood for your sexual assault today."

"What happened?"

"Me and Naomi got in a fight yesterday. Now she won't even talk to me. I'm totes bummed out about it."

Yoshiki had a look of boredom on his face until he heard the word 'bummed.' "Bummed, you say? I like your bum, Seiko-chan. What do you say we go over into that dark alley and-"

"Yoshiki, please. Tell me how to get Naomi to talk to me again."

Yoshiki thought for a moment, before a devious smile appeared on his delinquent face. "Alright, I have a plan. Naomi likes hentai, right? All you have to do is reenact a scene from one of her favorite hentai. I could help you, if you want."

"Wow, Yoshiki-senpai, that's a great idea."

Yoshiki's face turned beat-red when he heard Seiko call him senpai. "Aww shucks Gur hur hurrr..."

 **Woooaaaaahhh. What will happen next?**

 **Find out in CHappter 3?!**

 **SeikoXSachiko239 out!** (=｀ω´=)


	3. Life without Hentai Isn't Life At All

**Author's Note: Okay so if anyone was confused by the fact that in the first chapter, Seiko's mom supposedly unsubscribed from her channel even though Seiko's mom is actually dead in Corpse Party, let me explain. This is an alternate universe. All these events are what would have happened if Seiko's mom didn't die. You know, butterfly effect. Anyway it definitely wasn't that I forgot that Seiko's mom is dead, that would be ridiculous because I'm the Corpse Party lore master. *Nervous laugh* Anyway enjoy the chapter thx leave a review.**

 **Chapter 3: Life without Hentai Isn't Life At All**

On the way to Yoshiki's house, Seiko bumped into her cousin, Keichi-kun. Keichi-kun had brown hair and brown eyes. They always wore a pair of sunglasses and were drinking a protein shake. He could never wait to tell the nearest person nearby that he works out, even though his arms were skinnier than the weight bar he supposedly lifted.

Keichi, low-key flexing his muscles, (or lack thereof) said, "Oh hey cuz. I was just over at the gym working out. Watcha up to?"

Seiko looked at Keichi's twiggy arms and gave him a sympathetic smile. "Nothing much. Just on my way to Yoshiki's house. He's going to help me win back Naomi."

Keichi sighed and said, "You're seriously trusting that pervert again? Remember the time he totally "accidentally" groped you in class?"

Seiko thought for a moment, "Which time? There are multiple."

"Remember how he stares at you all the time in class?"

"Really? I'm flattered. Too bad I'm gay."

"You didn't know?! Anyway cuz, The point I'm trying to make here is that he just wants into your jar of peanut butter, if you know what I mean."

"I'm allergic to peanuts. He knows that."

"No! That's not what I mean. I'm trying to say he wants a slice of your pizza pie, if you know what I mean."

Seiko thought for a moment, confusion settling onto her face.

Keichi gave another exasperated sigh. "Just stay away from that pervert, okay?"

Seiko said, "What other choice do I have? Naomi is mad at me, so me and Yoshiki were gonna reenact one of her favorite hentais.

Keichi looked at Seiko like she was a complete and utter idiot. "That's obviously a ploy to get some of your figgy pudding, if you know what I mean. Why don't you just bring her chocolates or something?"

"Naomi is allergic to chocolate."

Keichi thought for a moment. "What about roses?"

"Nature gives her hives."

"Well what does she even like?" Keichi yelled.

"The only thing I've ever really seen her do is watch hentai. It's her passion."

Seiko could literally see Keichi's respect for Naomi plummet by the second. "Maybe you could take her to a hentai vendor?"

"She only goes outside to go to school and visit me. Nothing else."

Keichi gave one last sigh and said, "Whatever, Seiko. I feel like I need a bath after this conversation."

Seiko gave a "See you later, cuz!"

As Seiko watched Keichi walk away, she realized that she forgot literally everything that Keichi just said. She could not remember a single detail from their conversation, so she just continued on to Yoshiki's apartment.

 **Wooooahhhh! Chapter over. Did you like my original character? Me too!**

 **Anyway, thank you to redpandamanda1 for the continued support and inspiration.**

 **CAT-ch ya later!** **(** **๑ↀ** **ᆺↀ** **๑** **)**


	4. Life without Seiko Isn't Life At All

**What up fam squad, I've been super lazy with updating this critically acclaimed masterpiece. I hope this latest chapter makes up for it!**

 **Chapter 4: Life without Seiko-chan isn't life at all**

Yoshiki heard a knock on his door. He opened it to find Seiko, in all her total hotness, standing at his doorstep. It was a dream come true. A dream he had every night, in fact. Ever since he first saw her at the age of 6 in first grade, he knew that Seiko was the one for him.

"Welcome to my… Heh… Humble abode…" Said Yoshiki in the sexiest voice he could muster.

"Thanks." Said Seiko.

"Please… Follow me this way."

Yoshiki lead Seiko-chan to his bedroom. The walls were littered with hastily covered-up creepshots of Seiko.

"So, what's the plan, Yoshiki?"

"What?"

"You were gonna help me win back Naomi, yes? What's our plan?"

"Oh yeah, that…. Well, why don't you start by getting on my bed and taking off your clothes?" Said Yoshiki.

"Well, okay, if it'll help... " Said Seiko

Suddenly, Keichi-kun burst through the door. "Stop right there, sex offender! I know that you're trying to get my cousin's pizza pie, if you know what I mean. Don't listen to him, Seiko."

Yoshiki had pure hatred spread all over his face. "I'll get you someday, Keichi-kun… Just you wait and see…" Then Yoshiki left the house, even though he lived there.

"Wow, Keichi, That was close. Thanks for your help." said Seiko, who had finally realized Yoshiki's intentions.

"Are you actually retarded or something, Seiko? Geez, just go home before someone sticks their +15 Estoc in your Gaping Dragon, if you know what I mean." Keichi stormed out of the room muttering other sexual innuendos under his breath.

 **AAAAAGGHHHHHH! Did you like this chapter? It was worth the wait, wasn't it? Tell me it was! Leave a review, my kitens!1!**

(=◕ᆽ◕ฺ=)

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	5. Life Without Love Isn't Life At All

**WHAAAAT? Two chapters in one day? Dang, girl, I must be on a roll! Well, guess what? I'm gonna post THREE chapters in one day! YOU CAN'T STOP ME! NOBODY CAN! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA *HACK* *COUGH* *SPUTTER***

 **Chapter 5: Life Without Love Isn't Life At All**

Naomi-chan sat in her room, halfheartedly watching episode 23 of Onii-chan adventure 6: Uncensored Edition. Of course, she had already watched both the censored and uncensored edition multiple times, but it was her favorite hentai. Even though it was her favorite, however, something was distinctly missing. What was it? What could it possibly be? Naomi sat and thought for a moment, and sat for a moment longer, but she simply couldn't place her finger on it, until she glanced over to her nightstand.

There she saw a framed picture of Seiko-chan's face photoshopped onto a picture of a busty anime girl. Why hadn't she thrown that out yet? After all, Seiko and Naomi's relationship was over, right?

"It's all Seiko's fault," Naomi thought. "She let the YouTube fame get to her head."

Naomi let out a sad sigh. Maybe she wasn't okay with being alone. Maybe sitting in a dark room at 5:30 in the afternoon watching hentai wasn't as fun as it sounded. But what could she do? Seiko had ruined it all…

Just then, something caught Naomi's eye, or rather, someone. A young girl was walking by Naomi's house outside her window. She was so beautiful, it took Naomi's breath away. All Naomi could do is stare for a moment, before she recognized who it was. Yes, she had seen the girl before… But where? "That's right" Naomi said out loud, "She's in my class. What was her name again? Oh, right, Satoshi Mochida."

 **WEE WOO WEE WOO WEE WOO! You hear that? It's the cliffhanger police! I think I'm about to get arrested! It's okay though, I'm white. Anyways guys, make like a tree and LEAF a review! MRRRAAAAGHGHHGH! Isn't this story CLAW-some? Meeeow!** (= ᆺ =)


	6. Life Without Traps Isn't Life At All

**Here is the third chapter in one day. All my creativity has been spent, so I'll see you guys in about 1,000 years for chapter 7.**

 **Chapter 6: Life Without Traps Isn't Life At All**

After the whole Yoshiki incident, Seiko still was as determined as ever, but that didn't stop her from pursuing her YouTube career. In the past week, her channel grew from 5 subscribers to a hefty 23.

"At this rate, I'll surpass PewDiePie in a matter of weeks!" said Seiko, burning brain cells by the second.

Seiko was not all too concerned about Naomi. It had been, like, 3 days since they broke up, surely Naomi had forgiven Seiko by now. Therefore, she had plenty of time to sit and record Minecraft gameplay. YouTube videos don't make themselves, you know. Seiko would walk right up to Naomi and apologize, and all would be made right.

The next day at school during lunch, Seiko looked around for Naomi. She was standing by the window, talking to a mysterious girl. Naomi looked like a perverted old man standing over the frail girl, whos face was blushing hard. Who knows what lewd profanities Naomi was tenderly whispering in her ear? Either way, it made Seiko sick to the stomach. Had Naomi forgotten the time when it was she who Naomi whispered such lewd profanities to? Was their relationship so brittle that this one girl (who, yeah, was pretty cute) could make Naomi forget all of their romantic times together? Sure, they hadn't even kissed yet, but they were getting there!

Seiko could not handle this blatant display of cheating. She marched to the window where they were stationed and, with great volume, bellowed: "NAOMI NAKASHIMA, HOW COULD YOU?"

All eyes looked to wards Seiko, but then, realizing it was her, turned back to whatever they were doing previously.

Naomi felt surprise for a moment, but then let anger overtake it. "What do you mean, how could I? How could you! How could you push me away and ruin everything! Well, Seiko Shinohara, I don't need you anymore! I've found this fine piece of work here! Just take a look at that slender frame, smooth skin, succulent lips, and gorgeous eyes! Yes, Seiko Shinohara, I've found the perfect woman!"

After remaining silent all this time, the 'perfect woman' finally spoke up. "A-Actually, Nakashima-san… I'm a boy."

 **OOOAAAAAGGGGHHHHHH! Woohh. Wow. What a chapter, am I right? Very dramatic stuff going on here. Will Seiko win back Naomi? Will Naomi turn straight? Will Satoshi have a say in any of this? Find out next time on... SEIKO CHAN'S GREAT ADVENTURE!**

 **CAT-ch ya later!** ฅ/ᐠ｡ᆽ｡ᐟ\


	7. Life Without Filler Isn't Life At All

**I thought it might be a good time to check in on our favorite pervert Yoshiki. Ironically, this chapter is longer than the past two chapters combined. Oh well.**

 **Chapter 7: Life Without Filler Chapters Isn't Life At All**

Yoshiki was fuming. That one guy… Keichi... He was the only thing between Yoshiki and his lifelong love, Seiko. He had to pay. Literally. When he burst through the door, it had broken off it's hinges, and Yoshiki's part time job at WcDonald's wasn't enough to pay for it. But where to begin? Yoshiki didn't know anything about Keichi, other than the fact he's related to Seiko.

Yoshiki finally decided to ask the class rep of 2-9, Ayumi. Yoshiki never really liked Ayumi, mostly because of the fact that she always scolded him for trying to take creepshots of Seiko during class. The next day at school during lunch, Keichi was mysteriously absent, and so Yoshiki found Ayumi. She was reading a creepypasta on her phone. Everyone in class knew about Ayumi's strange eccentric and often obsessive affinity towards the occult. In fact, one might say it was a fetish of her's. As she was reading, her breath was very ragged and heavy, and occasionally she would let out little moans of pleasure, making everyone within a 10 foot radius of her very uncomfortable.

Yoshiki was, in fact, quite reluctant to approach Ayumi, but then he remembered the repair costs of the door, and so he valiantly stepped forward.

"Hey, c-class rep."

Ayumi, abruptly taken out of her horrifying fantasy, looked up and immediately scrunched her face into a scowl. "Kishinuma. What do you want?"

"W-Well, I just needed Shinohara's contact information."

Ayumi's face went from perturbed to disgusted. "Kishinuma, how many times do I have to tell you that stalking classmates isn't appropriate in a school setting?"

"N-No, Class Rep, I meant Keichi Shinohara."

Ayumi physically recoiled. "Bringing Seiko's family members into your perverted pursuits is a whole new low, Kishinuma. Am I going to have to notify Ms. Yui?"

"Wait, Class Rep, you don't understand! Keichi owes me money, that's all." said a desperate Yoshiki. Even though Yoshiki didn't really like Ayumi, this mental image she was forming of him wasn't very flattering. He didn't want people to think he was a pervert or anything (although it may have been a bit too late for that.)

"Kishinuma… How am I supposed to trust you after that one time you actually crawled underneath Seiko's desk WHILE class was IN SESSION to take pictures of her panties?"

Yoshiki opened his mouth to defend himself, but then realized he was completely indefensible. "Class Rep, he broke straight through my front door. My landlady is pissed to oblivion. I'm in a financial crisis! I'll prove it to you, if you want!"

Ayumi looked at Yoshiki for a moment. "Prove it how?"

Yoshiki thought, then spoke. "Well, if you'd come to my apartment, I could show you the door he obliterated."

Ayumi's face flushed. "T-This is just one of your perverted schemes, isn't it, Kishinuma?"

"No! Of course not, Class Rep! Scout's honor! All I need is Keichi's address, or something! Can you just help me out?"

Ayumi's face slowly returned to normal, and she avoided eye contact with Yoshiki. "Well, fine… I suppose I could go with you to see the proof. But if you try anything… Weird… I'm going to bloody your face, got it?"

Yoshiki put his hands up. "Understood, Class Rep. Besides, I'm only interested in Shinohara-san anyway. There's no way I would do anything perverted to your skinny body."  
"I don't know whether I should be deeply offended or absolutely relieved, but either way, my opinion of you could not be lower."

 **GAH! OOOOAGH! RAAAUUUGHH! *dies* This chapter was getting a little long, so I cut it into two parts, just to make it even more obvious that this is filler farce. Anyways, I hope you enjoyed! What'll happen next? Will Yoshiki get his door fixed? Will Ayumi ever warm up to Yoshiki? Will Keichi ever be able to lift more than 10 pounds? Find out next time on... Seiko-chan's great adventure!** ¯\\_₍⸍⸌̣ʷ̣̫⸍̣⸌₎_/¯


	8. Life Without Perfection Isn't Life At Al

**Hey, hey hey my kittens! It's that time again for another episode of Seiko-chan's great adventure! This one is a real knockout! Hope you enjoy!**

 **Chapter 8: Life Without Perfection Isn't Life At All**

"A-Actually, Nakashima-san… I'm a boy."

Silence spread throughout the room. It seems everyone had heard the news, and their mouths now stood agape. Even Ms. Yui's, who looked the most surprised of everyone.

"I always wondered why she- I mean he- wore the boy's uniform."

"Geez, why does everyone look so surprised?" Said Satoshi, clearly offended.

"Mochida, you're not being serious, are you? Those smooth and slender legs aren't the legs of a boy, are they?" Said Naomi, hoping it wasn't true.

"Nakashima-san, I'm sorry, I guess, but it's true."

A moment of silence. Two moments of silence. Three moments of silence.

Finally, the silence was broken by Seiko. "S-see, Naomi? Satoshi isn't even a girl. You belong with me. You'll come back, right? We're together again, right?"

More silence. Naomi's psyche had just been violently broken by this grade-A trap. The mere thought that this being made of pure femininity could have a Y-chromosome in their genes simply did not compute on a primal level. Naomi thought. Then Naomi contemplated. Then Naomi pondered. What if- perchance, it didn't matter that Satoshi was a boy? Perfection only comes once in a lifetime, if even that. So what if perfection came in the form of a boy? So what if perfection had a dingaling under their pants? So what? Perfection is perfection, and when perfection is so near, everything else looks worse in comparison. Naomi made a choice, right then and there, that she would not let perfection slip by. Naomi grabbed Satoshi by the hand firmly.

"Satoshi." she said.

"Y-yes, Nakashima-san?" said Satoshi, blushing from the fact that Naomi used his first name.

"I think I'm in love with you. Please be my boyfriend."

Satoshi was caught off guard with this sudden proclamation. It was made especially embarrassing considering that the eyes of all their classmates were still glued to them. Satoshi had never talked to girls much. Satoshi didn't really talk to guys, either. The only real friend he had was his little sister, Yuka. But now, this woman suddenly wanted him to be her boyfriend right out of the blue. What should he say? Naomi was gorgeous to be sure, but they hardly knew each other. Satoshi decided that an opportunity for female companionship wouldn't show it's head again for quite some time, and so he accepted. "Yes, Nakashima-san. I'll be your boyfriend."

 **MEEOUCH that has GOT to hurt for Seiko! What'll happen next?! Nobody knows! Not even me! I write these things on the fly! Did you enjoy it? Leave a review! Until next time, my kittens! SeikoXSachiko239 signing out!** (=｀ω´=)


	9. Life Without Investigation Isn't Life

**Here's the continuation of the filler chapter in the form of another filler chapter. I quite like this one. It's pretty long by my standards as well. I hope you enjoy it, too, my kittens!**

Chapter 9: Life Without Investigation Isn't Life At All

And so, Ayumi and Yoshiki continued onward to Yoshiki's place of residence. When they arrived, Yoshiki's door was indeed broken in half on the floor.

"See, Class-rep, that's what Keichi did!"

Ayumi was skeptical that a boy with arms as skinny as Keichi-kun could break a door in half. "How do I know that it was Keichi who did it? You could have framed all of this."

"Are you seriously considering that I broke my door in half myself just to get the contact information of the cousin of the girl I'm in love with?" Yoshiki asked.

"Yes." said Ayumi.

"Thank you for clarifying." Yoshiki looked around for any incriminating evidence, when his eyes rested on a half empty protein shake lying on the ground in front of the door that had eluded his sight before. "Look, class-rep."

Ayumi had noticed it, too. She crouched down and picked up the shake. She then stuck her fingers into the bottle and then sniffed them. "Muscle Milk. Keichi's preferred brand. Alright, Kishinuma. You've convinced me to at least look into this case a little closer. I can't have the students of class 2-9 known for breaking down apartment doors."

"Wait, you're coming with me? I appreciate it, class-rep, but all I really need is some basic contact info, so-"

"Not a chance, pervert. Again, the students of class 2-9 are my business, and so is students of class 2-9 misbehaving. I'm coming with you."

Yoshiki couldn't argue. Despite his disliking towards Ayumi, maybe a little company in this investigation wouldn't be so bad. "So, where are we off to, class-rep?"

"Well, here's the thing… I don't actually know where Keichi lives. He doesn't have a cell phone, either, in fact, the only information I have for him is the address is the 12 gyms he's a member of."

"What? Does he freakin' live at the gym? And hold on, he has 12 individual gym memberships? How does he even pay for all of those?!"

Ayumi just shrugged.

Yoshiki sighed. "Alright. So, I guess our only option is to search all the gyms in town to see if we can find him."

"Sounds good to me," said Ayumi.

And so, the two went to every gym within a 30 mile radius, showing everyone there a low-resolution picture of Keichi's face, asking if they'd seen him recently.

"That guy? Oh, yeah, I know that guy. Have I seen him here recently? No, actually, I haven't." This, and similar responses, are all they got out of most everyone there. It was a mystery. They showed the picture to the manager of one of the gyms, and he showed them surveillance footage from a week prior displaying Keichi with empty protein shakes strewn all around him struggling to lift the lowest weight of the shoulder-lift machine.

"That's him, alright." Said Ayumi, pitying the poor soul.

"Hey, wait," Yoshiki asked the manager, "He signed up for a membership, right? So you probably have his mailing address on record."

The manager rubbed his scruffy chin. "Yeah, s'pose so. But I'm not allowed to disclose private information of customers."

"Oh, come on! We're in his class! We just need to know his address! My landlady literally threatened to slit my throat in my sleep unless I pay for the door he broke, can you just help us out?"

"Well, now… It's against my contract to disclose private information, but…"

"But…?"

"You seem like nice kids… I'll give you his address. For a price."

"A price? We're not exactly loaded with cash." Yoshiki said.

"Not money…"

"Prostitution is out of the question." Ayumi said stiffly.

"Actually, I was thinking along the lines of cleaning the men's locker room."

Now, what must be understood is that this was no ordinary gym. This gym was only allowed to stay in business because all of the health inspectors would die when they got to the locker room. There was a bucket of gas masks for public use right outside the locker room doors, and the membership (Which was incredibly cheap) included a mandatory waiver claiming that deaths due to severe biological trauma were not the responsibility of the gym. The women's locker rooms on the other hand? They were fine. Yoshiki audibly gulped. He had seen the bio-hazard sign over the locker room door when they were asking around.

"We'll do it." Said Ayumi.

"Class-rep, what the flip?!"

Ayumi shook the hand of the manager, and walked briskly out of the door towards the locker room.

Yoshiki caught up to Ayumi and laid a hand on her shoulder to stop her. "Class-rep, what are you doing? It seriously isn't worth it, no matter how you slice it. We'll find out his address another way."

"No, Kishinuma. This is our last chance."

"Why are you saying that? Class-rep, I'm saying this for your own personal safety, you can't go through with this. Seriously."

"Kishinuma, I want to do it."

"What?" Yoshiki stood frozen for a moment. There's no way that this dainty little class representative actually WANTED to go into a locker room which could be smelled from three blocks over. It simply made no sense. Yoshiki turned ayumi around and saw a little smile combined with glazed over eyes and just a little bit of drool hanging from the corner of Ayumi's pink lips.

"What the diddle corn? What's wrong with you, Class-rep?"

"Wrong? Nothing's wrong, Kishinuma. Hee hee." Ayumi's cheeks flushed.

"Ayumi, don't tell me this is turning you on. Please, please tell me that this is NOT turning you on right now."

"Heeeee. Hoooo, no of course not-haaa aaaah…"

"Don't even try to hide it. Sheesh, of all the situations that you would find stimulating… You seriously creep ME out, and I'm the pervert here."

"What? Can you blame me? I mean, just think about it… Who knows what's in there? Maggots, flies, Dead bodies… Angry vengeful spirits seeking the souls of the living... It all just sounds so… Wonderful, doesn't it?"

"Class-rep, do you take therapy?" said Yoshiki, becoming legitimately concerned for the psyche of his class representative.

"Therapy? I started skipping that years ago. Doctor Ugi, if that IS his real name, couldn't grasp the majesty of the human anatomy splattered all across the walls in a murder case I found online. No, I don't go to therapy. Anyways, let's get going, Kishinuma-kun! Locker rooms don't clean themselves, you know!"

"Right. Yeah. Okay. No, that's fine. I'm just stuck here with a mentally disturbed person who wants me to go into a quarantine zone. All I wanted was some money to fix my freakin' door."

 **You know, I really wouldn't leave it on a cliffhanger, but it's too dang long already! Rest assured, kittens, it's gonna be good! I'll see myself MEOWt.** **(^≗ω≗^)**


	10. Life Without a GF Isn't Life At All

**Welcome one, welcome all to the tenth chapter of my critically acclaimed masterpiece known as Seiko-chan's Great Adventure. In this grand episode, our cast of characters is finally complete, but what roles will they play? Only time will tell. MERRRRROOOOWWW**

 **Chapter 10: Life Without a Girlfriend Isn't Life At All**

"Yes, Nakashima-san, I'll be your boyfriend." These are the words which had broke the camel's back. Seiko usually hid her inner feelings well, always putting a smile on her face, despite the circumstances. This, however, was simply too much to bear. Seiko stood there for just a moment in shock before her face crumpled into agonizing sadness. The tears flowed endlessly, much like a miniature river. There was no sound, save for Seiko gasping for air every few seconds. The sight was pitiful, to say the least. Completely unbefitting of a romantic comedy fanfiction such as this.

"Umm… Shinohara-san… Are you alright?" Asked Ms. Yui.

Seiko only gave a sob as a response.

"You can go home for today… I guess. Get feeling better."

Seiko walked out of the room, face still scrunched up into a physical manifestation of emotional pain. The whole situation was pretty awkward.

"*Sniff* What is up my Seikers *sniff* today we're *sniff* continuing on with part 65 of my Minecraft Let's play. So… *sniff* I don't know. Let's go punch a tree. My life sucks. My stupid GF freakin' dumped me, we're out of icecream, and my dog just peed on my sheets. Bye."

Part 65 of Seiko's Minecraft let's play wasn't a big hit among Seiko's 38 subscribers. Mostly due to the fact that it was 11 seconds long and practically identical to Seiko's last 6 videos. "Get yourself together you slob. What the heck am I donating to your for." This comment was left by Seikos_Mom47.

It had been one week since Seiko's heart was broken, and the pain certainly wasn't letting up. Her spirit and her will were broken past repair. Suddenly, the doorbell rang. Seiko, a sniveling, snotty mess, answered it. It was her classmate, Morishige.

"Kek. *Ahem* I came by to dropeth off the homework, M'lady."

"Kay, thanks." Seiko said before blowing her nose into a tissue.

"Art thou _really_ not over it yeteth? Cometh on, Shinohara, you can't just stay in here forever. At some point, you're going to have to faceth reality and cometh back to school," Said Morishige in his usual horrible accent.

"He's right, you know." Said Mayu, strapped to Morishige's back, not unlike a backpack. Don't even ask.

"Oh, I know you guys are right, but I just can't face that... _Thot_ Naomi and her rooty-tooty boyfriend. My blood boils for revenge, but my heart still loves her. What can I do?"

Morishige scratched his neckbeard. "Stop being a normie and accepteth that relationships with actual physical non-2D people are pointless."

"He's right, you know." Said Mayu, still strapped to Morishige's back. No, seriously, don't ask.

"Maybe you guys are right. I need to win Naomi back, no matter what!" Said Seiko, clenching her fist into pure determination.

"That's not what we said at all." Said Mayu, still, in fact, harnessed to Morishige's back, feet dangling in mid-air.

"You may not have said it, but I understood! Thanks for the pep-talk, guys! Oh, before I forget, don't forget to buy my Seiker merchandise. Use my spreadshirt link on my channel! Donate to my to get access to my videos eighteen minutes early! But most of all, smash that motha flippin like button!" Seiko yelled these things at Morishige and Mayu as she ran down out of her house and into the street in the direction of Naomi's apartment complex.

 **KYYYYAAAAAAAHH! Wowowow! Good chapter, SeikoXSachiko239! Why thank you, SeikoXSachiko239! Make like a tree and LEAF a review if you rike it! SeikoXSachiko239 signing out!** **=^._.^= ∫**


	11. Life Without An Ego Isn't Life At All

**Mee-yow! Hiss hiss! Welcome back, my k1tt3ns! This chapter of Seiko-chan's great adventure is focused on Morishige. Enjoy it, you ferocious felines! ;)**

 **Chapter 11: Life without an ego isn't life at all**

"Seiko, you suck. Please log off the internet and then log out of life." Morishige sat back in his $300 dollar gaming chair, satisfied with the comment he just wrote on this normie's Minecraft let's play video. Morishige immediately logged into his alternate YouTube account and posted another comment reading: "women shouldn't be aloud to play video games. Go back to the kitchen." Morishige's face once again lit up in smug satisfaction. Morishige, however, was still not satisfied. He logged into yet another alternate account and posted this comment: "kill you're self or i'll kill you're self for u." Morishige's job was done here. This would surely discourage this vile woman from posting content on the internet ever again. How dare a woman think herself valuable enough to actually speak into a microphone? And heaven forbid, actually POST it to the internet? It disgusted Morishige.

Morishige went to 4-Chan to see how people responded to _his_ latest post. "OP is gay." This was the first comment. "Lol OP thinks that Megumi-chan is best gril. Normie scum." This was the second comment. "You are the scum of the earth that squeezes out my poopy hole evry morning. I will litlry find and kill u"

These things were to be expected from 4-Chan. Morishige had signed up for such abuse the moment he made an account. Morishige had dedicated his life to becoming a meme warlord, and if this is what was required to rise through the ranks, _then so be it._

It hurt, of course. It all hurt so much. He looked down at his massive 400 pound body, and cried. The only way to make himself feel better was to make others suffer as he has suffered. That was his philosophy. That was his life. The tears ran down as his fingers typed more hateful comments unceasingly.

After having posted another 150 comments on various channels, Morishige fell asleep in his chair. When he woke up, it was 9 in the morning. He was late to school. Morishige heaved as he pulled himself off his chair, various butt-sweats having fused his chunky lump to it the previous night. He walked outside and saw the sun for the first time since Friday, it being Monday. He slowly lumbered towards the train station.

Morishige waddled through the halls, noticing that, as usual, people moved out of the way and tried to avoid eye contact as much as possible. Morishige took this as a sure sign of his superior genes, intimidating the local peasants. Nothing unusual. Morishige sat down at his desk, which had to be specially enlarged just for him so that his bulbous body could fit. Did I mention that Morishige is fat? Because he is. Morishige generally considered himself above petty school lessons, so he rarely paid any attention. Today, however, something, or rather, _someone,_ caught his eye. The teacher called on Mayu Suzumoto to solve a problem on the board, and for whatever reason, Morishige found her feminine charms to be irresistible. What could it have been?

Mayu sat down. Morishige couldn't stop staring. Even when Mayu turned and looked Morishige dead in the face, Morishige didn't flinch. Mayu, more than a little creeped out, looked away, hoping that if she paid him no attention, he would stop.

During lunch that day, Morishige contemplated his internal feelings. He had never actually felt desire towards a real, non-2D woman before, and it scared him. 3D women didn't call you 'master.' 3D women weren't part cat, nor did they wear skimpy maid outfits. 3D women, at least in Morishige's mind, were worthless. And yet, he found himself interested in this completely real, non-2D woman. How could it be so? Morishige simply had to find out. Yes, he would do something he had never done, nay, even thought about doing before. He would talk to a girl.

Morishige had seen it be done countless times in his favorite hentai. The male, confident, cool, and collected, would approach the young, naive, and feeble female, asking them out on a "date." Morishige took a deep breath, and walked towards Mayu.

Mayu was sitting with the class representative, Ayumi, who was showing something to her on her phone with a wide grin on her face and drool running down her chin. Mayu looked horrified. Morishige approached, cleared his throat, and said: "Suzumoto-san, it would pleaseth me greatly indeed if you would engage in jolly a social activity with none other than yours truly, perhaps something akin to a motion picture, or, if such lowly media doth not pertain to m'ladies tastes, dinner and a bookclub."

Mayu finally noticed that Morishige's nonsensical babble was directed at her and said, "What?"

Morishige, shaken in dignity, but not stirred in confidence said: "Will you go out with me?"

Mayu sat with her mouth agape, unable to formulate coherent thoughts.

Morishige stood looking at her expectantly.

"No."

"Excellent, M'lady, I look forward to our- Wait, what? B-but… Why? *ahem* I meaneth… It sorrows me greatethly, er… um, why dost thou not wish to? Any reasoneth ineth particulareth?"

"Well, for starters, I can barely understand you with that idiotic accent you put on. And for another thing, you've never even spoken to me or anyone in class, and also, you smell like a bloated whale carcass, not to mention you look like one, too. I would rather be slammed into a wall at superhuman speeds than go on a date with you. Did you honestly expect me to say yes? Seriously, take better care of yourself, dude!"

Morishige felt the burning arrow of rejection pierce his heart. With it, he fainted. He woke some hours later in the nurse's office. His face felt rather wet, and when he reached up to touch it, he realized they were tears. It wasn't just the fact he had been rejected. The truth had finally been spoken. Morishige's thin veil protecting his ego was torn to shreds, and with it, he now realized what a pitiful creature he truly was. Morishige made up his mind, right then and there, that he would win Mayu's affections, no matter the cost. He would change himself for the better, it would be a turning point in his life. This, he swore, would be the day that Morishige stopped being an insect, and instead became a man.

 **Now, I know what you're thinking, SeikoXSachiko239, did we REALLY need a** ** _third_** **simultaneous story arc? My answer to this completely rational question is: shut up, ur jsut jelous of my internet fame. LOL what a lsoer! dont liek, dont reed! Gosh! CAT-ch ya later, my |1773|\|Z** **(** **ﾐⓛᆽⓛﾐ** **)✧**


	12. Life Without Class-Rep Isn't Life At All

**Konichiwa my kittens! On this brand new episode of Seiko-chan's great adventure, we're continuing Yoshiki and Ayumi's story! What'll happen?! Such mystery! Woah! Wow! HUUHHHH~~~!**

 **Chapter 12: Life without the Class-rep isn't life at all.**

"Are you ready?" Asked the Class-rep, mouth contorted into a strange, twisted little smile.

"Ready as I'll ever be." Responded the Delinquent, making last minute adjustments to his gas mask.

Together, they stepped into the locker room. The gas masks, unfortunately, were not enough to contain the vile stench that permeated the air around them. The locker room was absolutely filthy. Inches of muck coated every possible crevice, and there were various insects and bugs abound. Even worse, there were the decaying corpses of people who were unlucky enough to receive a faulty gas mask, or whatever various circumstances led them to death in this place.

Suddenly, one of the 'corpses' jerked awake, still holding on to his last strands of life. His gas mask lay broken on the ground before him. He let out a moan of suffering, scrambling towards the pair of high schoolers, grabbing Yoshiki by the collar.

"Please… You have to help me… Please... I don't want to-" and with these pitiable last words, the man fell to the ground dead. Very dramatic stuff.

"That was… Wicked. Did you see how the light of life left his eyes just before he died?" Said Ayumi, who found this whole situation rather enjoyable. In fact, there was no place she would rather be at the moment.

Yoshiki, on the other hand, had just been traumatized for the rest of his life. The cost of the door was nothing compared to the cost of the future therapy sessions.

"Do you think he resents us enough to come back as a vengeful spirit and terrorize us? Because that. Would. Be. AWESOME!"

"C-c-c-c-c-c-c-class Rep… Can we just get this over with?"

"Fine. Whatever. Friggin party pooper." Ayumi said under her breath.

Ayumi took the mop from the bucket of water beside her, and the both of them got to work. The two were slaving away for the remainder of the day, mopping up muck, crushing bugs, and cremating corpses. When they were almost halfway done, Ayumi was getting anxious.

Yoshiki was constantly discouraging her from looking up from her work, because he knew she would get distracted, but it was also building up a significant amount of pent up frustration. This, in her mind, was the greatest place to ever exist. It was a vertical slice of everything she loved, everything gruesome, everything taboo, it was all here, and she wasn't able to enjoy it. Her body was trembling, her palms sweaty, her arms heavy, mom's spaghetti. It was torture.

What if, perchance, she took her gas mask off, just for a moment? She wanted to experience, in a small dosage, what had ended the lives of her fellow humans. She wanted to know for herself what it took to kill a man. Purely for research purposes, of course. She was tempted. Oh, so tempted. Her shaking hand steadily rose towards her face. She caressed the mask for a few seconds, playing with the idea in her head. She was going to do it. She really was.

"Class-rep, what are you doing?"

Ayumi spun around. "N-Nothing! Nothing at all."

Yoshiki looked suspiciously at her. "Well then get back to work."

"Yeah, okay." Said Ayumi, continuing to mop the floor. The idea was still there, though. Twisting, turning, burrowing its way into Ayumi's thoughts, consuming them. Her body couldn't handle it any longer. In one fluid motion, she tore the gas mask from her face, taking in a huge breath of the rancid air. Her senses were overwhelmed in the moment just before she lost consciousness. For what it was worth, it was enlightening. Luckily, her fall was cushioned somewhat by the muck caking the ground.

Yoshiki turned and saw what had happened. He knew he had to act fast if he wanted to save the class-rep. He dropped his mop and grabbed under her arms to drag her to clean air. She was heavier than he assumed, however, and the muck was slowing him down as well. He had no idea how much time Ayumi had until she suffocated, and so he heaved her upon his shoulders, making his way towards the exit. He burst through the door into the gym, and gently laid Ayumi onto the ground.

Yoshiki took a sigh of relief. What had she been thinking? Why would she choose to take of her gas mask under such dangerous circumstances? He really didn't understand this girl. And yet, she was unique. Yoshiki smiled, just a little bit, for the first time in a long time. He glanced over at the unconscious class representative.

She wasn't breathing.

Yoshiki started to panic. He looked around. It was dark outside, and the gym was empty. He quickly checked her pulse. Good, she still had one. He needed to perform CPR. What had they taught him in health class? Chest compressions. Right. He did 30 chest compressions on her. What came next? Yoshiki gulped. Mouth-to-mouth.

He realized this was an emergency situation, but he still felt a bit reluctant. He had never kissed a girl before. He wanted to save his lip virginity to Seiko, and putting his mouth on another girl's felt a little too much like cheating. He looked around again. "Is anyone else in here?!" He yelled into the void. "Anyone? Please…"

He looked back at Ayumi. He knew what he needed to do. Yoshiki tore his gas mask off, tilted Ayumi's head back and pinched her nose, and then he put his mouth on her's, creating an air seal, and then gave her air. He brought his face up, took a deep breath, and did it again.

Ayumi jerked awake, coughing and sputtering. Yoshiki backed away, having succeeded in saving her life.

"Kishinuma? What's going on?"

"Ayumi… Never… Never do something like that again. You seriously could have died… And, if you died… I- I don't know what I would do.

Ayumi blushed. "Alright, Kishinuma. I won't."

They sat in silence together for what felt like hours, with only the sound of each other's breathing to accompany them. Finally, the light of sunrise seeped through the windows, and the pair stood up. As they approached the exit, the manager could be seen getting out of his car and heading towards the glass doors with a key. He looked surprised when he saw them. He opened the doors. "So, you two are still alive, huh? I'll admit, I'm surprised. Is the locker room clean?"

Yoshiki spoke up, "It's as clean as it's going to get. Ayumi almost died. I don't care if you don't give us Keichi's address, we're done here."

The manager scratched his scruffy beard. "To be honest, I didn't really expect you to even try and clean it. You did well enough. I'll give you his info."

"Wait, seriously? You will?"

"Sure. Why not. You almost succeeded in doing what I asked, so, what the heck, right?"

Ayumi jumped with joy and Yoshiki shook his hand vigorously. "Thank you, sir. Really, thank you."

And so, the pair of high schoolers walked away side by side having received the address of Seiko's cousin, Keichi. Yoshiki turned to see Ayumi, who was looking at the sidewalk with a blush on her face.

"What is it, Ayumi?"

"Oh, nothing. I just had a nice dream while I was unconscious. That's all. Kishinuma?"

"Yeah, Ayumi?

"When did you start calling me by my first name?"

Yoshiki put his hand in his pockets and started blushing, too. "F-Forget about it."

 **oooooooh~~~ Romance is in the air! I can't wait until the next chapter! See you next time, mai kittens! SEIKOXSACHIKO239 OVER AND OUT! (T_T)7**


	13. Life Without The Soul Isn't Life At All

**Hey hey hey, it's me! SeikoXSachiko239! Here comin' at ya with another CRAZY prank! This time, we're gonna be posting chapter 13 of my Corpse Party fanfiction! You know, if any of y'all are arists, I wouldn't mind some dank fanart of this dank fanfiction.**

 **Chapter 13: Life Without The Soul Isn't Life At All**

"But Memushite-chan, what if the fetus consents?"

"Then I guess it would be okay, Kaito-kun."

Satoshi was in his new girlfriend Naomi's room watching hentai with her. Satoshi really, _really_ didn't like hentai. It was a barbaric take on what should be a beautiful connection between two individuals, instead reducing it to pure lust and nothing more. It was disgusting to him.

"Nakashima-san, I-"

"Please, Satoshi, call me by my first name."

"Alright. N-Naomi-san,"

"Yes, my love?"

"I was just wondering if… Well, if we could do something else."

Naomi laughed for a solid 15 and ½ minutes. She wiped the tears of hysteria from her eyes and said, "Like what?"

Satoshi thought for a minute. "Weeeeelll, we could, like, go get something to eat."

"I can't eat gluten."

"Okay, howabout we go to the shopping center together?"

"No need, I do all my shopping online."

"Listen, Naomi, I just wanna get out of this room. We've been in here for at least 12 hours. Will you at least unlock the door so I can go to the bathroom?"

"Bathroom? What's the problem? I told you I have bottles in the corner. Do your business in there! Don't be such a big baby, Satoshi! Oh, who am I kidding? Your constant complaining only makes you cuter~!"

"Ha… Yeah… Listen, Nakashima, I mean, Naomi… Um, How long are you going to keep me in here?"

Naomi's face went blank. "As long as it takes to convert you."

"Convert me? What?" Satoshi was beginning to think that maybe agreeing to be Naomi's boyfriend wasn't the wisest decision after all. He could see the crazed look in her eyes. "Naomi. Do you love me? Do you truly, from the bottom of your heart, love me?"

Naomi was taken aback by this sudden question. "W-Well, of course I do. You wouldn't be my boyfriend if I didn't love you."

"Why?"

Once again, Naomi was surprised by this question. "Why? Well, I suppose it's because… You suit me… Physically, that is. Your face, so slender. Your eyes, as brown as the sea. Your body is as perfect as perfect could possibly be. Whenever I look at you, shivers get sent down my spine. Whenever I hear you speak, it's like sweet butterflies have come to tenderly kiss my ears. That's why I love you."

"... I see. T-Thank you." Satoshi noticed that all of the things she listed had nothing at all to do with the kind of person he was, instead they were focused on his body. Satoshi was a tender soul. He sought to one day find a woman who connected with him on an emotional level, one who could fulfill his needs as well as have her needs fulfilled by him. Sure, looks were important, but in the end, what mattered was the soul. Satoshi could tell that he and Naomi would never see eye-to-eye on this, however, and it made him a little sad. He wanted Naomi to see him as a person, not just a brand new toy she opened on Christmas.

Naomi leaned towards Satoshi. "So… What do you love about me?"

Satoshi rubbed his barren chin, pondering this question. He could answer the obvious: she was beautiful. Everything about her appearance pertained to Satoshi's preferences. He could tell her this, and she would probably be satisfied, but Satoshi wanted to find something… Greater… to like about Naomi. Despite her quirks, her really, _really_ big quirks, there was something there. Something _more_ than her looks and her obsession with animated pornography.

"I guess… I guess I like your soul, Naomi. You're a good person."

"AWWW, THAT IS SO SWEET! C'MERE!" Naomi lunged at Satoshi, holding him in a tight embrace. Just then, Naomi's mom knocked at the door.

"Naomi? Are you in there? A package just arrived for you. I'll leave it outside the door."

Naomi loosened her grip on Satoshi. "Package? Oh, gosh, that's right! Wait here, Satoshi! I have something for you!"

"A… Present?"

Naomi skipped towards the door and retrieved her package. She threw it onto her bed and opened it gleefully. She pulled the object out of the box and spun around, presenting it to her boyfriend with a wide grin on her face. "Ta-da!"

"A… Dress?"

"Yeah! Isn't it cute? I chose it especially for you, beloved!"

It was a pretty little red dress with lots of frills and a neckline deeper than the mariana trench.

"You're… going to wear that?" 'To be honest,' thought Satoshi, 'it looks a little small for her, though I wouldn't mind seeing her in it.'

"Tsk, no, you silly billy. It's for you! Hurry, put it on! Oh, I've been so excited to see you wear this! I can't wait!"

A dress. Naomi wanted Satoshi to wear a dress. Satoshi knew he was an especially effeminate boy, and he had even come to accept the fact that he very much looked like a girl, but even so, he still had a drop or two of manly pride left in his body, and this was seriously pushing it. He was about three seconds away from walking out the door and never coming back, but then he saw how happy Naomi looked at the thought of him wearing it. He realized that _she_ thought it would make _him_ happy, too. Even if it didn't make him particularly happy, could he really refuse such a heartfelt gift from the girl who gave him unrequited love? It broke Satoshi's heart to think of how easily he would break Naomi's heart. If wearing a dress is all it would take to make this girl happy, then why not do it? What kind of person would Satoshi be if he couldn't grant this sweet girl's one wish? "I'll do it," Satoshi said, taking the dress from Naomi's hands, "but you have to leave the room while I change, okay?"

Naomi was already halfway out the door. "See you in a minute!" She chirped.

Naomi was sitting in a chair reading lewd manga, waiting patiently for Satoshi to finish. The door finally opened, and an almost heavenly glow illuminated the skinny boy. The dress fit perfectly, and suited him considerably. Naomi realized she had no idea just how attractive Satoshi could be until this very moment. Her eyes welled with tears of joy, having seen quite possibly the best thing she would ever see. Naomi could no longer control herself, she lunged at Satoshi, and this time she kissed him. She realized what she was doing and retracted. "Um… I'm… Sor-"

Naomi could not finish her statement, because Satoshi had silenced her with his own lips.

 **Very romantic, I know! Things have gotten serious between our characters, haven't they? Which do you prefer? Romance or comedy? Post your preference in a review! Please. I need reviews. I'm desperate. K, thanks. Bye. (^.^)**


	14. Life Without Crack Isn't Life At All

**REEEEEEEEEEE**

 **Chapter 14: Life without crack isn't life at all**

"Excuse me, sir, could you tell me where I am?"

The hardcore drug addict looked the young girl up and down. "Do I know you?"

The young girl thought for a moment. "No, do I know you? Oh wait, the answer is also no. Anyways, I've been following this map to my ex-girlfriend's house for like, six hours, and I think I'm lost." Seiko handed the man the map she had been dutifully attempting to decipher.

The man, trying not to look high, took a glance at the map. "Well, there's your problem, it's upside down!" He handed it back to the girl in the correct orientation.

"Oh, silly me! Thanks, sir!" and with that, the girl was on her way. Unfortunately, both of them failed to realize that the so called "map" she was in possession of was, in fact, just an old candyland game board.

Seiko wasn't exactly the sharpest tool in the shed on a good day, but between her anxiety about Naomi and the overwhelming amount of lung cancer inducing Marijuana smoke permeating the air, Seiko really couldn't think straight, though she _was_ very relaxed. "Now where is Grandma Nutt's house…?" It seemed that Seiko had taken a wrong turn somewhere and ended up in the junkie district. "Ah, there it is!" Seiko, being extremely high, had mistaken the writing on a sign hung over a dark alleyway to be "Grandma Nutt's house," when in actuality it read "Bust a nut house."

She went into the dark alleyway and came to a door with another sign over it reading: "Bust a nut house is here!" And so Seiko opened the door and went inside. She came to a very nice looking lobby with a receptionist behind a polished oak desk with a little mascot plushie of a man cracking open a walnut sat atop it.

The receptionist's eyes were closed. "Hello, and welcome to Bust-a-Nut. May I take your order?" she said, extremely bored.

"You're Grandma Nutt, right? That means I only have 66 more spaces till I get to Naomi's house!"

The receptionist, who had a nametag labeled 'Yggdrasil,' opened her eyes and looked very surprised. "Oh, you're a female? Then you must be here for an interview. Hold on, sweetie, I'll tell the boss. You just sit tight for a few minutes, kay?"

Seiko didn't remember applying for any kind of job, but then again, she didn't remember her own name at the moment, so she sat down on one of the nice lobby chairs and picked up a magazine.

A few minutes later, Yggdrasil came back into the lobby and motioned for Seiko to follow, which she did. She was led through several hallways that looked like they hadn't been touched since the seventies, covered in flowery wallpaper and patterned carpet. Finally they arrived at the door of an office, and Yggdrasil said, "Wait here, hun. It'll only be a second," and then she went inside.

After a while of awkward waiting, Seiko heard a voice come from the office.

"Come in."

Seiko stepped inside, and was greeted by the heavy aroma of old people and hand sanitizer. The room was just a white marble box with a simple desk and chair in the middle and a single light bulb hanging from the ceiling. Behind the desk sat Yggdrasil, clad in a roman style toga, but still wearing the nametag.

"Sit down." She said.

"But… There's no chair…"

"I didn't say sit down in a chair, Seiko Shinohara."

"Huh? Wait, how do you know my-"

Yggdrasil put a finger to her lips, motioning for Seiko to be silent. "Sit down."

Seiko sat on the hard marble floor, criss cross applesauce style.

"Now, something is troubling you, yes? Something to do with your girlfriend."

"What? Naomi? I thought I was here for some kind of interview… Just who are you anyway?"

The middle aged woman laughed. "I suppose I'll tell you, child. I am Yggdrasil, goddess of Crack. You breathed the holy fumes of Crack Cocaine, and now you have come to meet me. So, while you're here, why don't you tell me what ails you?"

This made a surprising amount of sense to Seiko, but she wasn't in the mood to chitchat. She stood up, intending to leave the establishment, but the door she came in was missing. Now it was just her and the goddess. No windows, no doors, no hope of escape. "So this is some kind of dream? If I'm asleep, then what happened to me in the real world?"

"The real world? Some druggie was smoking crack while you were walking by, so now you're passed out in a WcDonald's parking lot high as a kite. You won't be coming down anytime soon. So, sit down and we can talk."

A chair effortlessly melded into existence in front of Seiko, and so she sat down. "Of course Naomi is troubling me. And it's all her fault, too! Her and that stupid trap, Satoshi! What did I do to deserve this, anyway? I was a good girlfriend! I did nothing but support Naomi through thick and thin! But did she ever support me? No! All she ever cares about is her stupid hentai." Tears welled up in Seiko's eyes.

"Child, I can see that you truly believe these things, but there's something else, isn't there? I sense guilt. It wasn't entirely Naomi's fault, was it?"

"Guilt…? I'm not guilty of anything… The whole thing that started this was the fact that I told her I didn't like hentai anymore. How is any of this _my_ fault?!"

"Child, it was your own stubbornness and lack of communication that lost Naomi. You pushed Naomi away when she was trying to cheer _you_ up. You abandoned her just as much as she abandoned you. Never once did you try and apologize straight up, but instead schemed and plotted, coming up with roundabout ways to 'win' her back, as if she were nothing but a trophy. You expected her to crawl back to you like some poor lost puppy. Even your first meager attempt to say sorry was bred in insincerity. What part about this is _not_ your fault? What _don't_ you have to be guilty of?"

The tears were now streaming freely down Seiko's face, much like a miniature river. "That's not true… I… I never meant it like that… You're wrong about me! It's not… My… Fault…" The room was melting all around them, turning into utter darkness. The desk and chairs disintegrated, leaving Seiko crumpled on the ground and Yggdrasil standing over her. Now it was only them and an infinite plane of nonexistence.

"But child, it is your fault. You hurt those around you with your ignorance, and now you refuse to own up to it."

Seiko knew it. She knew everything coming out of the Crack Goddess' mouth was true, and she knew she needed to listen to her. "What… Should I do?"

Yggdrasil gave a warm smile, and the room returned to normal. "Do what you should have done from the start. Give her an apology, let her know how you really feel. No tricks. No schemes. Just heartfelt confession. Do as I have commanded you, and Naomi's heart will soften."

The room around the two lit up like the midday sky, and Seiko could feel her presence in the dream fading away. "Wait, what's going on?!"

"Goodbye, child. Heed my words!"

 **Wowow! Guten morgen, meine kittens! I hope you enjoyed that chapter! Y'all better leave nice reviews now, ya hear? Or else. NAWWW I'M JUST KIDDIN' PUDDIN'! I'd never hurt a precious kitten of mine! Now it's time for me to retreat into my basement to write more fanfiction, because this is just what I do now. Still waiting for that dank fan art, by the way. Also, if you don't think that Seiko and Sachiko would make the PeRfec couple than your rong and i hat you. I HAT YOU!111**

 _ **SeikoXSachiko239 has disconnected from the server**_


	15. Life Without Gramer Isn't Life At All

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: Sorry guys, BAD NEWS! My African sex slave died last week of something called "Malnutrition" (I don't even think that's a real word, LOL) Anyways, the point is that he was the one who proofread all of my writing, and so there might be a few spelling or grammatical errors in this one. Again, I APOLOGIZE! I promise this issue will be fixed by the time I write the next chapter. Girl Scout's honor.**

 **Chapter 15: Life without gramer isn't life at all**

Seiko was a waking up in the WcDonald's praking lot.

She felt muy heavy. **(OTTER'S NOTE: MUY MEANS ""VERY"" IN SPEANISH!)**

She smell smthn very bade.

It was her. She had lots of tha poopies all over her, she did not know if was her poops or sombdys elses?"

""Wow! I smell the very bad!" Seiko said…

Seiko wnated to get clean bc she was very bad the smelling was.

"Hmm… How does one getting clean?"

Seiko saw sign ovr building: "GET CLEAN HEAR FOR FREE!"

"O! VERY CONVENENT! I GO THERE NOW!" an Seiko went ther.

It was a showers public bathhouse. Seiko wen in and tooken a shower. Ooooh~~ dont look, boys! Scrub a dub dub! RUB RUB RUB!

Wen Seiko was ther e clean, she went a out of the batthous and she saw a man ther! Out side!

Seiko inastly recognisd the man, it was El Diablo, the local drug lord!

El Diablo snifed around, smellin' for SEiko. "SEIKO I Smell U! U Stol My Crack Cocaine! Nwo U Shall Die!"

Seiko was muy afraid. She hidden underneth the dumpster so El Diablo could not sniff her. "GO AWAY EL DIABLO I DONT EVEN LIKE YOUR CRACK!"

This angrd El Diablo, aslo he herd Seiko yellin, so he new wear she was. El Diablko wsa aproching the dunpster, when SUDENLY! !

NARUTO CAME AND KILLED EL DIABLO WITH A COOL KATANA **(Otter's note: Narutto takes** **pliece in same universe as this fanfiction, so thats why Naturo is there, okay?)**

Naruto slice El Diabib's head rite off:

Seiku said: "Wow! Thnacks you, Namurto!"

Nermutato said: No probem, bby…"

Seiku Said: Wow! "U are so atractive, I almost turn straight! But Nowami is way cutter."

Namomo said: "ITS ok, I thunk Maoni is cutter, 2."

JSUT THEN! EL DIBABIBS ROSE FRUM DEAD AND KILD NATURO!

"Ha. Now Naruro Is Deadid. Ha."

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO"

Smaeiko was very sad insid. Muy sad.

JUST THAN: NARUTO ROSE FROM DAD AND BECOM BATMAN1 **(Otter's note: Baytman taks place in sam univer a s tha fanfic, K?)**

Batman said "I am the mbat man. Who is also Naruto."

BATMAN KILL EL DIABLO AND THEN EAT HIS CORPSE SO HE NOT ROSE FROM DEAD NO MORE **(Otter's note: Ha, more liek, eaet his Corpse… PARTY!)**

Baman burp real loud. The n he disapper.

Seiko roll'd her eyeballs and said: "Wsoahehfioksnlm"

Than she wnet forrward to Naomi's hause

 **Thank you for reading my fanfiction. I miss Abdul. He was the muy good at in English, even tho he was from African. I didn't know you had to feed them, and so he dieded. If you don't leave a nice review on this chapter, I'm going to enslave you and force you to proofread my fanfiction for the rest of your natural lifespan. THANKS! SEIKOXSACHIKO239 OUT!**


	16. Life Without Confidence Isn't Life At Al

Chapter 16: Life Without Confidence Isn't Life At All

 **Howdy y'all! It's me, SeikoXSachiko239! I hope my kittens have been behaving themselves.. ;)**

 **Since my last chapter I have kidnapped an English professor named Archibald to proofread my fanfiction, so it will probably be more readable this time. :))))))**

 **(Archibald's note: due to the extreme stupidity of Naruto and Batman being in the Corpse Party universe, I have taken the liberty of omitting them from the canon of this fanfiction. Also I miss my family please send help.)**

Seiko, Imbued with determination, strode to Naomi's doorstep and gave a mighty knock upon the wooden door. Seiko guessed it was oak, but in reality it was maple. It was at this point that Seiko realized she had no plan whatsoever as to how she would convince Naomi to being her GF again. Seiko started to panic, pacing around with anxiety. She had tried everything, fake apologizing, reenacting hentai, yelling at her, what else was there to do?

Seiko started banging her head on the maple wood door (that she thought was oak) out of frustration, hoping the blunt force trauma would inspire her.

Suddenly, it came to her. The idea that would undoubtedly win Naomi over. The one that would bring her and Naomi to the altar, surely.

A tournament arc. _A tournament arc._ **A tournament arc.**

There would be a great tournament, and Naomi would be the prize. There comes a time in every great anime where there must be a tournament, and all the main characters must participate. And, in the great anime of life, that time had come.

Seiko had been banging her head on the door for a good 25 minutes, but still no one answered. Luckily, though, she had made a head-shaped hole in the door, and so she reached inside and unlocked it, letting herself in. She peeked into the kitchen and saw Mrs. Nakashima baking cookies.

"Oh, Seiko, Dear, when did you get here?"

"Are you deaf you literal pile of garbage? I knocked on the door like a million times you old cow."

"Hm? What's that, dear?" Naomi's mom paused the Linkin Park song she was listening to and took off her headphones. "Sorry, dear, I couldn't hear what you said."

"Oh, that's okay, Mrs. Nakashima. I just said: Are you deaf you literal pile of garbage? I knocked on the door like a million times you old cow."

Natsumi Nakashima laughed and went back to listening to Linkin Park.

You could certainly tell that this was Naomi's house, what with all the body pillows and hentai posters strewn about. The air was heavy and hard to breath, presumably because of all the sin. The air only grew thicker as Seiko approached Naomi's door. Her heart fluttered, remembering the last time she was in Naomi's room. They were watching Onii-Chan Adventure 6 (Censored Edition.) This wonderful memory renewed Seiko's confidence, and so she didn't bother knocking on the door. This is where she belonged.

 **REEEEEE I'm back baby! Did you think I could let my magnum opus rot away into obscurity? Now review this chapter. DO IT! DO IT NOW! IF YOU DON'T DO IT I'LL CUT ARCHIBALD'S NOSE OFF!**


	17. Life Without Halloween Isn't Life At All

**MRAAWWW HISS HISS MY KITT3NS!11!11**

 **It's HALLOWEEN! My favorite holiday! What would Halloween be without some of your favorite Corpse Party fanfiction? It just wouldn't be the same! This chapter is special, as in, Halloween Special! It takes place a few months before the first chapter. Enjoy, my kittens! 3333**

 **Chapter 17: Life Without Halloween Costumes Isn't Life At All**

Seiko was stumped, just what was she going to be for Halloween? She was twelve hours late for Yoshiki's party, and she had no idea what to dress up as. Seiko thought, and thought, and thought, until finally, she had an idea! It was to call Naomi.

"Naooomiiiiii!" Seiko wailed.

"Seiko? Where are you? Yoshiki refuses to end his party until you come. All the snacks are gone and Yoshiki is about to freakin' slit his wrists if you don't show up soon. He's not kidding, either. Satoshi is trying to get suicide hotline, but the signal sucks so bad his phone can't connect."

"Nao-Nao, I can't think of a costume to wear!" Seiko wailed again, more distressed than ever.

"What? Is that why you're not here? It's been twelve hours now, why haven't you thought of something? And why are you _just now_ asking me for help? Are you clinically retarded? Get over here, now! I think Yoshiki is about to start cutting."

"NAAAAOOOOMIIII It's a HALLOWEEN party, I can't show up without a costume you idiot!"

Naomi let out a heavy sigh. "Honestly, I would prefer it if you didn't wear anything. We're a little old to be dressing up for Halloween, don't you think?"

Seiko shriveled up a bit. "You would prefer it if I-"

"Hold on, YOSHIKI PUT DOWN THAT PLASTIC KNIFE! NO! Oh gosh- so much blood... Listen, Seiko, I'm hanging up. Get over here as fast as you can, or Yoshiki might commit seppuku."

And with that, the call ended.

Seiko thought about what Naomi said. Was it really appropriate to show up to a Halloween party without wearing a costume? Could Seiko really lower herself to the degeneracy required to come to a party, whose host fully intended her to be in a costume, but not have one? It just didn't seem right. Besides, Naomi was there. She didn't want to embarrass herself in front of her girlfriend. Nor anyone else for that matter.

But… It _was_ what Naomi wanted…

Seiko was reluctant, though, and began looking for anything else she could wear, before remembering she only owned her school uniform and a pair of purple pajamas.

There was no other choice, she decided to go to the party costume-less.

The night was cold, and the moon was she walked to Yoshiki's apartment, people on the street kept giving her weird looks as they passed by.

Finally, Seiko couldn't take any more of the humiliation. "STOP LOOKING AT ME! YOU'RE THE FREAKS! YOU! NOT ME! WHAT?! YOU THINK YOU'RE BETTER THAN ME JUST BECAUSE YOU'RE ALL WEARING COSTUMES, IS THAT IT?"

The people closest to her all looked down, trying to avoid eye contact, walking away as quickly as possible while the ones farther away simply stared.

Seiko whose mental health was deteriorating by the minute, cleared her throat, straightened her back and continued to on to the party.

"It really _is_ cold tonight, though." Seiko said to herself as she took a shortcut through a playground which was surprisingly populated with children for it being midnight on Halloween. One of them was coming down the slide and ran right into her.

"Woah, are you okay small child?" Said Seiko, hoping their parents weren't around to sue her.

The child just looked blankly at her.

"Helloooo?"

The child continued to look blankly at her, almost like a retarded dolphin of some sort.

"Oh gosh, I think I broke it! How do I reboot this thing?" Seiko looked the child all over trying to find some kind of button to reset the damage that must have been done from the blunt force trauma of going down a small slide into her soft thighs. Unfortunately, she didn't find it, and so she left the child in the dirt, hoping to escape before any parents were notified.

Seiko was getting a bit hungry. She had been saving calories for the party snacks, but seeing as they were all gone, she decided to do some trick-or-treating. Seiko walked up to the door of a house across the street from the playground in a dingy looking neighborhood and gave it a knock.

It took a minute, but eventually an old man answered the door, seemingly having been woken up. Wiping away the tiredness in his eyes, he said, "You kids just keep coming later and later every year don't you?" He finally opened his eyes and saw Seiko. Looking a little flustered he said, "W-why, young lady, you're a little old to be trick-or-treating, aren't you? And at this time of night, well…"

"I know, I know, I'm just _really_ hungry, sir. Do you have any candy left over?"

"Hungry, huh…?" Said the man, looking quite hungry himself as he stared at Seiko. Snapping out of his trance, he said "Oh, yes, of course. Come inside, young lady. I don't have any candy, but I have some, uh… Sausage in my… meat drawer."

Seiko didn't know what a meat drawer was, nor did she think it would be very sanitary, but she was hungry enough to give it a try. She eagerly stepped into the man's house and plopped herself onto his living room couch. The man, seemingly quite excited, gave the "give me a minute" sign and retreated into his kitchen.

Seiko looked around the old house. It was unique in terms of interior design, especially considering how old the man was. You would think he would have a family picture or two, of a wife, child, sister, brother- _something._ He didn't, though. In fact, the living room was quite empty. There wasn't even any carpet or wallpaper. There was only the dirty couch Seiko was sitting on, a small coffee table with a tissue box on it, and a pair of binoculars mounted on a tripod looking out of the window. Seiko got up and took a look through them, revealing it was pointed at the playground across the street. The child that slammed into her was still sitting on the ground in a vegetative state.

The man was taking a pretty long time; time that Seiko didn't have. She decided it was time to go at the exact moment the man walked in carrying a box against his lower torso.

"Woah, young lady, where are you going? Don't you want to open my… Heh… Meat drawer?"

"Sorry, sir, but you took too freakin' long and now I'm even later to the Halloween party. Gosh, my girlfriend is gonna be so mad…"

The man looked dumbfounded. "Wait… Girlfriend? Are you one of them… Gays? The'unns that've been on th'news as of the lately? The ones who're infringin' my rights as a wholesome Christian boy?"

Seiko was offended. "Geesh, dude, it's 2008, get a grip on reality you bigot."

The man was enraged. "You have soiled these holy grounds with your abominations. Prepare to die!" the old man seemed to be entering his final form, the righteous flame of heaven itself appearing around him, causing the entire house to shake and crumble. The feeble old man's muscles grew into rippling hunks of solid man-meat, and his eyes lit up into a horrifying red glow.

"lol bye" said Seiko. And with that, she simply left the house. It was 1;30 in the morning when she finally saw Yoshiki's apartment building. She triumphantly went inside and found the door with a crudely-drawn picture of a ghost with the caption: "Yoshiki's dank Halloween party."

Seiko rang the doorbell. It was Satoshi who answered.

"Seiko! You're finally-"

"Yup! It's party time!" Seiko didn't even care that she wasn't wearing a costume anymore, she was just happy to be among friends. She confidently went into the apartment to find the other party guests. She found Yoshiki in a pool of his own wrist blood crying, being comforted by Naomi closeby.

Yoshiki was the first one to look up and see Seiko. Immediately, his nose exploded with excitement. He then passed out. Naomi looked up, and she flushed with embarrassment.

"I'm finally here, Naomi!"

"Seiko," She said, looking down, red as an apple.

"What is it, Naomi?"

"Why are you naked?"

Seiko looked puzzled. "What do you mean? Isn't this what you wanted?"

 **THE END**

 **OOOO~ You like that PLOT TWIST?! I BET YOU DID YOU PERVERTS**

 **The next chapter is going to be a continuation of Morishige's story, so STAY TUNED!**

 **Oh, and HAPPY HALLOWEEN! \\(^o^)/**

 **~~~SeikoXSachiko239 SIGNING OFF~~~**


	18. Life Without Anniversaries Isn't Life

**Wowee, my kittens! Can you believe it? It's been exactly one year since I posted chapter one of this masterpiece! REEeE!**

 **I simply couldn't let the day pass without posting another chapter! Sorry I haven't posted in so long, I've just been busy, well, you know, dealing with involuntary employee drama. These things happen. Anyways, this chapter gets pretty dramatic! Enjoy it, kittens!**

 **(ALSO I KNOW I SAID THIS CHAPTER WOULD BE ABOUT MORISHIGE AND MAYU BUT I WAS LYING SO WHATEVS)**

 **Chapter 18: Life Without Anniversaries Isn't Life At All**

Seiko knocked on the door loudly.

No reply.

Seiko knocked again, louder this time.

Still no reply.

Seiko wasn't in a patient mood. She grabbed a nearby Shion Sonozaki body pillow (that was rock hard from all of the various dried-up bodily fluids caked on its surface) and used it as a battering ram to knock down Naomi's door. What she saw next she soon wouldn't forget.

"Naomi? Mochida? W-What are you guys doing?"

Sitting on the floor, wrapped in each other's embrace, was Naomi and Satoshi who were totally making out. It was really gross and they probably got cooties later that day so whatevs. It seemed that Seiko's feeble whisper of an exclamation wasn't enough to get their attention, which was obviously diverted elsewhere.

Seiko's fists tightened. In the two years she and Naomi had been together, they had never even dared to hold hands, much less touch lips. And now, just a few mere days after they had broken up, Naomi was sitting there swapping spit with a _boy_ of all people. This wouldn't do. This couldn't do. Seiko couldn't believe it. Seiko felt rage and sorrow all at once bubble up to her blushing surface. Her fists clenched even tighter.

"T-Tournament…"

It wasn't enough, they still didn't hear her.

Slightly louder this time: "T-Tournament… Arc…"

It still wasn't enough. They were still locked into an impassioned embrace.

"TOURNAMENT ARC!"

That did it. The both of them jumped in surprise and turned quickly to see who now stood over them. Naomi looked a bit shocked, while Satoshi only scooted back in embarrassment, hiding his effeminate face. Naomi's shock didn't last long as it quickly boiled into anger and then fizzled out into indifference.

"Oh, it's _you._ Who let _you_ in?" Naomi said sharply.

Seiko couldn't look her in the face, so she looked at the ground instead. She wanted nothing more in that moment than to run home and bury her face in her pillow and cry. "Naomi… Just now, you were-"

"Yes, it's official now. Me and Satoshi are boyfriend and girlfriend."

"But… you and I, we never-"

"Never what, kissed? Yeah, I guess not. I suppose that just goes to show how shallow our relationship was, right?" Naomi stood up and started to pace the room. She was blushing, too. "I mean, it's no wonder we broke up! You couldn't even muster the courage to hold my hand, for goodness sakes! And my birthday? Forget it! Literally! You forgot my birthday three years in a row even though we've known each other our entire lives."

"Naomi…"

"What?! Naomi what?! What do you want from me? What could you have possibly come here to tell me?

"I'm sorry… I'm so sorry… Naomi, I'm sorry."

Naomi turned and saw tears falling from Seiko's face, still glued to the ground. "W-Well, you should be!" This was starting to become uncomfortable. "You should be… And… And it's too late now, anyway! I've found someone better! Someone who actually cares! She- er, he's perfect!"

Satoshi had slipped out the door unnoticed long ago.

"Naomi… Please… Please give me another chance," Seiko sniveled, "Please, Naomi! It hurts not to be with you!" The idiotic idea of a tournament had faded from Seiko's mind. Now all she could do was grovel. "I'll be better! I can do better! I've learned my lesson, Naomi, just please take me back! I'm sorry that I got caught up in my YouTube fame! I'm sorry I forget your birthday! I'm sorry that I wouldn't watch hentai with you! I'm sorry for everything, Naomi!"

Seiko suddenly looked up into Naomi's eyes and reached for her hand. Naomi pulled back and looked away. A tear began forming in her eye, too. "I think it's time for you to leave, Seiko."

There was nothing left to do. She had tried her best. Tears still streaming, she solemnly walked out of Naomi's room, past Satoshi, and out the door.

Satoshi timidly stood in Naomi's doorway and looked at her.

"I think it's time for you to leave, too, Satoshi."

"I… I'll see you tomorrow? I guess?"

"...Yeah. Tomorrow."

 **Sheesh, that was dramatic! I CAn'T beLieVe NaoMi diiid thaat!**

 **I sure hope the next chapter isn't so dreary.**

 **Will Nao-nao get back with Seik-seik? You'll find out eventually!**

 **CAT-ch YA L8ER H8ERS** (=´∇｀=)


	19. Life Without Lifting Isn't Life At All

**Chapter 19: Live Without Lifting Isn't Life At All**

 **Author's Note: Hewwo my cute little kittens! OWO wats dis?!**

 **Here is that Morishige x Mayu chapter I promised so long ago!**

 **Is anybody still here?**

 **Is anybody still listening to me?**

 **Does anyone care?**

Morishige knew what he had to do. He had to lift. He had to become the buffest, strongest, sexiest man in town if he wanted a sliver of a chance with Mayu. He knew he had to be the best, and he knew where he had to go. Morishige put on his most comfortable onsie and walked towards the exit of his apartment. On his way out, he saw his $3,000 gaming PC, lights all ablaze, inviting him to sit down in his expensive gaming chair to play some Nekopara (uncensored edition).

The temptation… Morishige could feel it… Morishige wanted, oh so badly wanted, to watch some cute anime girls with cat ears rub his virtual feet… But he had a job to do. His job was to get friggin' swol.

Morishige headed towards the local gym. He decided against bringing his scooter that he usually rode around on, just to burn a few extra calories on the way, but the exhaustion was already getting to him. The overcast sun was beaming down upon him, causing him to sweat like a wild beast. His legs would surely give out before he got across the street where the gym was. Morishige had reached his limit. It was time to give up, throw in the towel, go kaput.

Something entered Morishige's mind. Something beautiful. Flashes of something he desperately wanted.

"Wow, Morishige, you look freakin' buff as heck, dude." It was a voice, a female's voice, a soft, gentle, high-pitched voice… It was Mayu's voice. "I totally want to date you because you are very hot and have big muscles and a superior intellect all at once."

This is what Morishige wanted. This is all he wanted. Morishige, with great strength, stood up off the asphalt and marched towards the gym. He just had to find somebody… A certain somebody who knew everything there is to know about lifting.

"Keichi Shinohara."

Keichi did not hear Morishige, because he was too busy flexing in one of the locker room mirrors. With great force, Morishige bellowed:  
"KEICHI SHINOHARA I WANNA GET FLIPPIN' JACKED MY DUDE!"

Now this was the language Keichi spoke. He turned and saw the 479 pound Morishige standing there drenched in sweat. Keichi's eyes lit up. "Bro, really? You want me to, like, train you?"

"Yes." Morishige said.

Keichi tightened his headband and pushed his designer sunglasses up to his face. "Let's get started."

"HGHGHHHHHGHGHGHHAAAAHAGHGGHHGHH" Said Morishige matter-of-factly as he tried to lift the bar above his head.

"The key to gettin' swol is drinking 75 Premier Protein shakes a day, and eating nothing else." Said Keichi. "After about a week of doing that, you should probably be as buff as me." Keichi patted his noodle-arms affectionately.

"No Doritos?"

Keichi shook his head.

"No Mountain Dew?"

Keichi shook his head.

"No Reese's Peatnut Butter Cups?"

Keichi shook his head so violently there was an audibly loud crack.

Morishige was about to give up before he thought of Mayu's tender lips once again. "Alright, I'll do it."

 **(Author's note: For this part you can just look up Eye of the Tiger up on YouTube or something idk also just imagine Morishige working out a lot and jogging up some stairs okay bye)**

[INSERT TRAINING MONTAGE HERE]

After a week of hard training, Morishige had lost 359 pounds. He was almost skinnier than Keichi. He could walk across the street almost 700 times a day without collapsing. Morishige looked at himself in the mirror and beamed with… disappointment.

"Keichi!" Yelled Morishige. "Where are my muscles?! You said I would have big muscles!"

Keichi looked at the incredibly skinny Morishige and burst into tears. "My whole life is a lie, Shig! I don't know what I'm doing, I've never known! Nobody loves me, not even my clueless cousin Seiko ever wants to hang out with me! I don't have friends, I don't even have parents! All I do is work out, work out, work out, hoping that I'll look better eventually, but nothing ever works! I don't know what to do, Shig! I'm scared, lonely… I think I might kill myself later today…"

Seeing that Keichi wasn't going to be any help, he stormed out the gym. "Fine, I don't need muscles anyway. Now that I've shed my blubber, it's time to groom myself, and then…" Morishige thought of the blissful moment he would come back to school and impress Mayu with his dashing looks. "Then we'll finally be together…"

 **Does anyone still read my fanfiction? If you still exist, please leave a review telling me about your favorite brand of spaghetti sauce.**

 **I like Hunt's Zesty.**

 **SEIKOXSACHIKO #( SIGNING OUT ANF OFF"" :3 :3 :3**


	20. Life Without Compensation Isn't LifeAll

**Hewwo, my |1773|\|5, here is a nother chapper of the critically acclaiemde Seiko-chan Great Adventure story written by myself because Corpse Party is a cool video game and it has multiple characters that I enjoy very much htnak you 4 redding it i luv u all**

 **Today's chapter is the continuation of Yoshiki and Ayumi's arc, and things get pretttyyy wiccckkeeedd, dudes!1**

 **Chapter 20: Life Without Compensation Isn't Life At All**

Ayumi and Yoshiki walked together in the direction of Keichi's house in silence, nearly pressed against each other as they traveled the narrow sidewalk. Yoshiki was facing a lot of complex emotions at the time. Emotions that are hard to write about because they're really deep and stuff like that. He had never liked a girl other than Seiko, whom he had such lust for it made him giddy with excitement even at the thought of her swirly hair bun thingies that drooped from her thankfully skin-covered skull. But with Ayumi… It was different. Yoshiki wasn't all that attracted to her borderline prepubescent figure, nor the way she had a fetish for human suffering, but he did feel… Something. Searching for Keichi so that he could be held responsible for destruction of private property had brought them closer together.

"Looks like this is it," Ayumi said, holding the piece of paper the gym owner had given them with Keichi's address. "Are you ready?"

Yoshiki, lost in thought, snapped to attention. "Huh? Yeah, of course. Let's go."

She knocked on the door. No answer.

"He didn't answer." Said Ayumi.

"Yes, I can see that." Said Yoshiki.

She knocked again. No answer.

"He didn't answer." Ayumi said again.

"Well," Yoshiki rolled up his sleeves, "looks like we're gonna have to break his door down!"

"No, you idiot! Door breakage is why we're here in the first place!"

"Fine…" Yoshiki relaxed. "So what do we do?"

Ayumi knocked on the door once more. No answer.

"He didn't answer."

"Alright… Surely his apartment has a window. Maybe we can climb through it."

"Right, and while you do that, I'll keep knocking on the door."

The plan was set. Ayumi went to work on slamming her knuckles on the door, and Yoshiki went around the other side of the apartment complex looking for a point of entry.

Aha! Plenty of windows. Except, which one was Keichi's? Yoshiki couldn't just climb through every apartment until he found Keichi. While he thought, there was a soft, rhythmic noise pervading his thoughts. Could it be Ayumi's knocking?

"Class-rep, you genius!" And so he began. He knew his apartment was on the third floor, so, with two toilet plungers he found in a nearby dumpster, he began scaling the building, heading towards the knocking sound.

"This is it!" Yoshiki said, looking in the window of an apartment littered with empty protein shakes. He opened the window, climbed inside, and opened the door for Ayumi.

"That was quick."

"That's what she said." Yoshiki was a master of comedy that could not be bested please give this man an award for his originality thank you.

Ayumi roll'd her eyeballs which she generally used to see things with and went down the hall. "Keichi? It's Shinozaki-san, the class-rep! Are you here?"

As the pair walked down the unlit corridor, the amount of empty protein shake cartons started to increase. It wasn't long until they were up to their knees in the things. A soft crying could be heard from the final door on the right.

"Keichi, is that you?"

Ayumi, leading the way, slowly turned the door handle, and with some effort managed to push past all the protein shakes and open the door.

Nobody was in the room.

"Nobody is in the room, Kishinuma." Ayumi said this because there was nobody in the room.

"What do you mean that nobody is in the room?" Yoshiki was confused because he probably assumed there would be somebody in the room or something idk. "Where's the crying coming from?"

It could be heard clearly, now. Loud verbal pangs of depression rang out from an unknown source in the room. Suddenly, movement could be seen from beneath a massive pile of protein shakes in the center of the room, sending cartons cascading down the hill.

"There!" shouted Ayumi before eagerly beginning to unbury whatever pitiable lifeform nested below.

She seemed strangely zealous, a dark glint in her eye as she worked. Probably because she was getting off on the pain of another human being.

"Um, here… I'll help," Yoshiki said, gingerly approaching the mountain of cartons.

Ayumi spun around, and with a flash of her eyes and menace in her voice she said, "Don't get in my way, kid." The thought of seeing a sniveling, crying mess of a Keichi-kun had possessed her.

Yoshiki shrugged. No use in interfering with her calling.

"There he is!" With tremendous strength only granted to those whose degeneracy drove them with more vigor than anything else, she pulled from within the mound a disheveled, sad looking Keichi-kun.

Keichi, clearly surprised by this turn of events, looked frantically at the two classmates while Ayumi held him in the air by his collar. In an instant, he snapped back to his usual laidback, equally pitiable self. "Oh, hey guys, didn't hear you come in. What's poppin'?"

"You won't believe the lengths we've gone to find you, Shinohara-san."

Keichi's eyes lit up. "R-R-R-R-Really? You guys have been looking for me? Like, you actually care about my geographical location?"

"Of course, Shinohara-san," Said Yoshiki, sending waves of validation throughout Keichi's body, "After all, you violently broke my very expensive door down, remember?"

"Oh."

"Yeah, thing is, I can't afford to fix the thing. For the past few days I've been using a big black garbage bag I found in a ditch by the side of the road as a makeshift barrier. It smells, too. Probably because of the body that was in it. Anyways, I need you to pay for another door. Preferably oak or mahogany, you know, something classy."

Keichi, still suspended in the air by Ayumi, (most likely disappointed by the fact Keichi was able to hide his emotional pain so effectively) crossed his arms and turned his nose up in apathy. "Why should I pay for the door of a guy that nearly raped my cousin?"

Ayumi gave Yoshiki a look of disgust. "You did _what?_ "

Yoshiki raised his arms in defense. "Woah, woah, woah, it was consensual… Almost."

"Seiko is practically retarded, I don't think she even has the ability to consent, you animal." Retorted Keichi.

"Well, hey, it didn't even happen, so…"

"So you're still a pervert." Ayumi let go of Keichi, who limply fell into the pile of protein shake cartons. "Why did I agree to come with you in the first place? You're nothing but a repulsive, perverted sexual delinquent with no self-control. You're scum. How could I forget?" Ayumi shuddered with fury and disgust with herself for, even if just for a moment, neglecting the fact that the platinum blonde boy that had been in her company for the last 24 hours was, in reality, a pervert completely and utterly obsessed with another girl. She began to briskly walk away.

Yoshiki reached after her, wading through the waist-high sea of protein shake cartons. "Ayumi, wait!"

Ayumi spun around. "Don't call me by my first name - and don't follow me!"

Soon enough, it was just Yoshiki and Keichi standing alone together. It was awkward, to say the least.

"That's rough, buddy. Wanna form a suicide pact?"

"Don't talk to me right now, man." And with those words, Yoshiki started the long, solemn journey home.

 **O NO! NO NO NO NO NO NO NO... THIS CANOT HAPEN GUYS WHY? WHY DID AYUMI DIO THIS TO YOSHIKIIIIIII? I CAN"T HANDLE THIS RIGHT NOW, GUYS, SERIOUSLY, I GOTTA GO LAY DOWN FOR A WHILE, KAY? SEE YOU LATER MY |1773|\|5...**


	21. Life Without Lust Isn't Life At All

**Hey, y'all! I hope my cute little kittens have been good in my absence!**

 **Today's all about Shig and Mayu. This one's for you, WhackuOtaku.**

 **Chapter 21: Life Without Lust Isn't Life At All**

"If you really think very hard about it, we live in a society. There are people in the world."

Mayu stood in front of the class proudly presenting her presentation on international politics in the modern world when the lean, mean, fighting machine Morishige entered the room wearing a crown of roses and a muscle suit. He jauntily pranced into the classroom, clearly anticipating his second round with lady love now that his 2% body fat was on his side.

"Issues exist. Some people might even say there are problems in the world. I may or may not agree with this stance, but one thing is for certain: there are opinions and not all of them are the same."

Nobody had noticed Morishige's over-the-top entry. He politely sat down and then began clearing his throat in the most obnoxious manner he could muster.

"But what can _you_ do about the fact there may or may not be undesirable circumstances in the world? I think that is for every individual to decide on a case-by-case basis, so I am most likely unable to give you an answer."

Morishige was now practically screaming at the top of his lungs for attention. Nobody turned around. Mayu was simply too good at capturing the hearts and minds of the Japanese populace.

"There are countries and that is a fact. People live in them. Some have hair. Thank you."

The class stood up, and, with tears in their eyes, applauded with such rigor that their great-grandchildren could still feel the pain of their palms. Morishige was now screeching with all his might, and then disaster struck.

Morishige lost his voice.

What was, just a moment prior, a very annoying and ear bleeding cry for even a sideways glance, was now nothing more than a vain attempt at producing sound.

"Oh no," Morishige did not say because he was unable to speak, "How could this happen?" What was he going to do? How could he profess his undying love for the girl he spoke to once before if he was unable to profess anything at all? Tears welled up in Morishige's massive eyes and they fell down drop by drop, shining like mercury because that's just what happens when you're Japanese. **OTTER'S NOTE: IF U DONT UNDERSTAND THEN UR NOT A REAL OTAKU!**

Ms. Yui, still clapping for Mayu, went to the front of class. "Wow, Suzumoto-chan, that was real sugoi indeed. I love you romantically. Please send me lotsa chocolates every day by way of postal service. Thank you. Anyways, our next presentation will be by Seiko Shinohara. Don't screw it up you little piece of crap."

Mayu sat back down, three rows away from Morishige. This would not do. With the strength of someone wearing a foam muscle suit, he clambered on top of his desk and tore the person sitting next to him out of their seat and onto the cold, lonely floor. Morishige then tore the next person from their seat as well, making the floor slightly less lonely.

He plopped himself right next to Mayu, who was transfixed by Seiko's presentation on why dating traps should be banned from the UN.

"Hey," Morishige did not say because he could not speak. Instead, there was just a small burst of air that came from his throat, which was enough to make Mayu look over at him.

Her eyes went wide. Who was this sexy beast sitting next to her? Had he always been there? His lean face, his rippling muscles, his fearless unveiling of his feminine side by wearing a crown of roses, yes indeed, this man was attractive. She blushed with the force of a thousand suns. "H-Hey, hehe, who are you?"

Morishige was stunned, did she not recognize him? "It's me, Sakutaro Morishige." Morishige did not say because he could not speak.

This only made Mayu blush even harder. "Strong _and_ silent…"

Morishige clearly needed a more effective way to communicate, so, with his superior intellect, he devised a plan that was sure to get his feelings across. He stood up, and with unmatched grace he performed a beautiful interpretive dance filled with messages of lust. And nothing else.

By this point, Mayu could no longer contain herself. She stood up and joined him, and the two, bound together by nothing but surface level attraction, put all of their lewd desires into an emotional dance that easily surpassed any piece of art ever produced, both past and future.

Too bad the entire class was busy learning about why you should legally be allowed to kill a trap for stealing your girlfriend, because wow, it was great.

The pair, covered in passionate sweat, embraced each other. Morishige opened his mouth to speak, but Mayu put a finger to his lip to silence him.

"Sssshhh, you don't have to say a word. Meet me on the roof after school."

Mayu turned and walked out of the classroom, leaving Morishige to wonder where she had gotten the severed finger she put to his lip from. "Maybe 3D women aren't so bad after all."

 **AWW DANG LOOKS LIKE SHIG IS IN THE HOLE AMIRITE?!**

 **UP TOP, HYAH!**

 **STAY TUNED FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER OF SEIKO-CHAN'S GREAT ADVENTURE! ! !**


	22. Life Without Parental Advice Isn't Life

**Howla there mis anmigos! Soy an fanfiction author mucho! Read this chapter and you may receive eternal blessings in the afterlife!**

 **I've been gone for so long, my kittens, I know, but I've come to tell you that this chapter is all about Naomi. What'll happen? Find out...!**

 **Chapter 22: Life Without Parental Advice Isn't Life At All**

Naomi sat alone in her room, surrounded by the nauseating smells of dried up bodily fluids caked onto her body pillows and erotic manga collection. These familiar scents usually comforted her, but not today. Not after the emotional roller coaster she had been on in the past few days, from having her heart broken by Seiko to finding a new passionate love in Satoshi.

Mrs. Nakashima popped her head into Naomi's room. "Hey honey, want some cookies?"

"Not now, Ma. I'm dealing with some very complex emotions right now and cookies will only improve my mood and make me think more clearly so that I can make decisions in a reasonable and unbiased way."

"But sweetie, sugar cookies are your favorite!" Mrs. Nakashima presented the platter of cookies, which were in the shape of busty anime girls with their pantsu showing. The smell was to die for. "I went to all the effort of baking these for you and that nice looking girl you brought over earlier… but… well, now she's gone, and Seiko, too... "

Naomi's face softened. "Alright, Ma. I'll have some cookies."

Mrs. Nakashima looked pleased. She walked into the room and sat her child-bearing hips down on Naomi's bed.

Naomi, sat on the floor, scooted closer and took a busty-anime-girl-pantsu cookie and took a bite. It was wonderfully warm.

She laid her head down on Mrs. Nakashima's lap and Mrs. Nakashima began stroking it softly.

"It's been a hard week, Ma."

"Talk to me about it."

"Well, you know Seiko, right?"

"Of course I do. You've been best friends since you were five years old," Mrs. Nakashima chuckled to herself, "I remember that one time - when you were both about twelve I'd say - when you two stayed up all night watching Onii-Chan Adventure 3: Uncensored Edition. In the morning, when I came to check up on you, the room was caked in so many bodily fluids I had to get the floor changed."

Naomi faintly smiled. She had forgotten about that. Remembering it now just made her sad.

"Or how about that time when you and Seiko entered the school talent show in eighth grade?"

Naomi laughed. "Ms. Tanimura nearly died from that third degree burn... but, still, we won!" Those were the days. Naomi let out a sigh. Why did things have to change? She wished she could capture those fleeting memories and relive them forever, but that wasn't possible. Time moves forward, on and on, and people with it. It seemed to Naomi that the best moments in one's life were the most fleeting of them all. The happy parts fly away in the breeze while the rotten negatives sink to the bottom, and there they remain. "I wish things could still be like that."

"What do you mean, sweetie?"

Naomi's smile was gone. She wasn't revelling in the past anymore; she had to face the present. "Me and Seiko… we're through."

"Through?"

"Yeah, Ma, we broke up."

"You broke up?" The shocked expression on Mrs. Nakashima's face made Naomi realize just how monumental of a proclamation that was. "Why?"

"Because…" Naomi had to think for a moment. "Because… she didn't treat me right. She was selfish. She was mean. It- It was just the right thing to do. She didn't really care about me at all."

"Naomi Nakashima, don't tell me you broke up with your best friend since kindergarten just because you had _one_ measly fight."

"Well, I-"

"Naomi. Relationships are all about _communication._ If you don't like how someone is treating you, you _talk_ to them about it!"

"I know, Ma, but-"

"But what?"

"Well, I found someone else!"

Mrs. Nakashima paused for a moment. "You mean that cute girl who was here just a few minutes ago?"

" _Boy,_ mom. _His_ name is Satoshi, and yes, we're in love."

"Boy? You're in love with a boy? You mean there's a chance I'll get biological grandchildren?"

"Sure, I guess."

"Carry on, then." Mrs. Nakashima stood up and walked out of the room, leaving the platter of busty-anime-pantsu cookies behind.

Naomi took a bite out of another warm, delicious, sexy cookie. Her mother's words had left an impact on her. What if she hadn't given Seiko enough credit? What if her apology was genuine? What if she had made a mistake, and leaving her best friend / lover / friend with benefits in the dust so that she could pursue a luscious, unintentional trap she hadn't spoken to until a day earlier would result in a wrong end or something? What if? What if…? "What if I'm still in love with Seiko?" Naomi thought.

 **:O**

 **Wow! I cannot believe that really happened! Will Naomao get back with Seikakuku after all? Not even I know! The answer is kept in a secret vault 3 miles underneath the Earth's surface!**

 **~~~~ SEIKOXSACHIKO #( SIGNING OUT_**


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